OSRS Goblin Paint Cannon: The Ultimate Guide to This Quirky Weapon

Old School RuneScape (OSRS) is packed with unique items that bring both fun and utility to the game, and the Goblin Paint Cannon is one of those hidden gems. Whether you’re a PvP enthusiast, a lore lover, or just someone looking to mess around with friends, this quirky two-handed weapon offers a blend of nostalgia, practicality, and outright hilarity. In this comprehensive guide, we’ll dive deep into everything you need to know about the Goblin Paint Cannon—its origins, mechanics, uses, and why it’s still a fan favorite in 2025. Let’s get started!
The Goblin Paint Cannon is a two-handed melee weapon in OSRS, originally introduced during the 2014 Goblin Invasion event. It’s not your typical combat tool—it’s more of a playful gimmick with surprising utility. You can grab it from Diango’s Toy Store in Draynor Village for a modest 225 coins, making it accessible to players of all levels.
A Brief History
Back in 2014, the Goblin Invasion event pitted players against goblins or guards, depending on their allegiance. The cannon, then called the “Event RPG,” was handed out by the Goblin Recruiter or Guard Recruiter to mark enemies with paint, making them attackable. After the event, it stuck around as a permanent item, rebranded as the Goblin Paint Cannon in September 2022. Its original “360NoScope-paint” option nodded to gaming memes, adding a layer of humor to its legacy.
How It Looks and Feels
Picture a clunky, goblin-crafted contraption that shoots paintballs instead of deadly projectiles. Its inventory icon is famously upside-down, a quirky detail that adds to its charm. Despite its ranged-like behavior, it’s classified as a melee weapon, which makes it an oddball in the OSRS arsenal.
Mechanics and Stats of the Goblin Paint Cannon
Let’s break down what makes the Goblin Paint Cannon tick. It’s not just a novelty—it has some unique stats that make it a viable choice for certain builds.
Attack Speed and Damage
The Goblin Paint Cannon boasts an attack speed of 3, matching the swiftness of shortbows on rapid style. This is rare for melee weapons—only three others (Swift Blade, Ham Joint, and Mystic Cards) share this trait. However, its damage output is negligible, with no bonuses to speak of, making it more of a niche pick than a powerhouse.
The “Paint” Feature
Here’s where the fun comes in. When equipped, other players get a right-click “Paint” option. Activating it triggers a spin emote, followed by a paintball shot. Most of the time, you’ll miss, with the paint splattering randomly. But there’s a 1-in-15 chance to land a hit, confirmed by a cheeky “By some miracle you hit the target!” message. It deals no damage, so it’s purely for laughs or light trolling.
Where You Can Use It
Surprisingly, this weapon can be taken to Entrana and Glarial’s Tomb—places where combat gear is usually banned. This quirk stems from its non-threatening nature, despite its weapon classification.
Why Use the Goblin Paint Cannon in OSRS?
So, why bother with a weapon that doesn’t deal serious damage? The Goblin Paint Cannon has carved out a niche thanks to its speed, accessibility, and playful vibe.
PvP Builds: The Low-Level Advantage
For low-level PvP accounts, especially those with 1 Attack, the cannon’s attack speed outshines slower weapons like the Iron Scimitar. Pair it with Strength training, and you’ve got a decent glass cannon setup for early-game skirmishes. It’s a budget-friendly alternative to pricier options like the Swift Blade.
Fun and Social Play
Beyond combat, the Paint feature is a hit at social gatherings. Imagine chilling in the Grand Exchange, painting your friends (or strangers) for a laugh. It’s a low-stakes way to interact and break the monotony of grinding.
Event Nostalgia
For veteran players, the Goblin Paint Cannon is a memento of the 2014 event. It’s a piece of OSRS history you can still wield, bridging the gap between past festivities and today’s adventures.
How to Get the Goblin Paint Cannon
Getting your hands on this quirky weapon is straightforward, but there are a few things to know.
Purchasing from Diango
Head to Draynor Village and visit Diango’s Toy Store. For 225 coins, the Goblin Paint Cannon is yours—no quests or requirements needed. If you lose it, you can reclaim it from Diango, though the destroy text misleadingly suggests the long-gone recruiters.
Availability Updates
As of April 8, 2025, the cannon remains fully functional, though past updates (like a temporary equip ban in June 2024) show Jagex occasionally tweaks it. Keep an eye on patch notes to stay in the loop.
Alternatives and Workarounds
If Diango’s shop is out of reach (say, you’re an Ironman fresh off Tutorial Island), you’re out of luck—it’s not a drop or craftable item. Plan a quick trip to Draynor when you can.
Tips and Tricks for Using the Goblin Paint Cannon
Ready to make the most of this oddball weapon? Here are some practical and fun ways to wield it.
Optimizing for PvP
For PvP, focus on these strategies:
- Boost Accuracy: Wear gear with melee accuracy bonuses, like an Amulet of Accuracy, since the cannon has no inherent stats.
- Strength Pairing: Train Strength via non-combat methods (e.g., Blast Furnace) to keep your combat level low while maximizing damage.
- Location Matters: Stick to low-level PvP zones like Lumbridge or Edgeville for fair fights.
Maximizing the Paint Feature
Want to land more paint shots? It’s all RNG, but try these:
- Crowd Control: Use it in busy areas like Falador Square—more targets, more chances to hit.
- Team Up: Coordinate with friends to paint each other for a colorful chaos session.
- Emote Spam: Chain the spin emote with other animations for a goofy combo.
Training with the Cannon
While not ideal for XP grinding, you can use it to train Defence or Strength on low-HP foes like monks at Edgeville Monastery. Its speed ensures steady hits, even if they’re weak.
Use Case | Pros | Cons |
---|---|---|
PvP (1 Attack Builds) | Fast attack speed, cheap | No damage bonuses |
Social Fun | Paint feature, emote | RNG-based hits |
Training | Consistent hits | Low damage, slow XP |
Pairing with Other Gear
Combine the cannon with cosmetic items like the Goblin Mask for a thematic look, or slap on a Rune Scimitar as a backup for when the paint runs dry (figuratively—it’s unlimited!).
The Goblin Paint Cannon may not be a meta-defining weapon, but its blend of utility and silliness keeps it relevant. Whether you’re a pure account builder or a casual player, it’s worth a spot in your bank. So, grab one from Diango, paint the town (or your friends), and enjoy a slice of OSRS’s whimsical side!