How to Make the Wise Old Man Angry in OSRS: A Fun Guide

Old School RuneScape (OSRS) is packed with quirky characters, and the Wise Old Man in Draynor Village is one of the most iconic. Known for his wisdom and occasional grumpiness, this NPC has been a staple of the game since its early days. But have you ever wondered what it takes to push his buttons? In this guide, we’ll explore how to make the Wise Old Man angry in OSRS, diving into his personality, in-game interactions, and some playful ways to rile him up—all while keeping it lighthearted and lore-friendly. Whether you’re a seasoned player or a curious newbie, this blog post will give you the lowdown on turning this sage into a grump, plus some tips to optimize your gameplay experience.
Before we get into the mischief, let’s set the stage by understanding who the Wise Old Man is. Located in Draynor Village, he’s a retired adventurer named Dionysius with a storied past. He’s not just a random NPC—he’s tied to quests like “Swan Song” and has a reputation for being both helpful and a bit eccentric. His house is filled with oddities, and he’s known for offering advice, identifying items, and even robbing the Draynor bank in a infamous cutscene. But beneath his calm exterior lies a temper that players can provoke with the right (or wrong) moves.
The Wise Old Man’s Personality
Dionysius is a mix of wisdom and impatience. He’s seen it all—dragon slaying, treasure hunting, and pesky adventurers asking dumb questions. This makes him a prime candidate for getting annoyed when you waste his time or disrespect his legacy. His dialogue often reflects a dry wit, but push him too far, and you’ll see his cranky side emerge.
Why Make Him Angry?
Why bother ticking off an old man in a video game? For fun, of course! OSRS thrives on its community’s love for memes, challenges, and silly interactions. Making the Wise Old Man angry is a playful way to engage with the game’s lore and test your creativity. Plus, it’s a great conversation starter in the Grand Exchange—imagine bragging about how you got under his skin!
Steps to Annoy the Wise Old Man in OSRS
Now, let’s get to the good stuff: how to actually make the Wise Old Man angry. While there’s no official “anger meter” in-game, certain actions and interactions can trigger his less-than-pleasant responses. Here’s a step-by-step guide to stir the pot.
Step 1: Ask Dumb Questions Repeatedly
The Wise Old Man offers a service where he identifies items for you. Bring him something trivial—like a bronze dagger or a bucket—and ask him about it over and over. His patience wears thin when you treat him like a walking wiki instead of a legendary hero. Keep spamming the dialogue option, and you’ll notice his tone shift from helpful to exasperated.
Step 2: Mention His Bank Robbery Fiasco
During the Draynor bank robbery cutscene, the Wise Old Man famously teleports in, takes out guards, and loots the place. Bring this up in conversation by choosing dialogue options that poke at his questionable morals. He doesn’t like being reminded of his chaotic side, and you might get a snippy reply as he defends his actions.
Step 3: Waste His Time with Useless Trades
Try offering him junk items via the trade screen—think rotten tomatoes or cabbage. While he won’t accept them, repeatedly attempting to trade nonsense can frustrate him. Pair this with asking about the items’ “value,” and you’ve got a recipe for some grumpy muttering.
Quest-Related Ways to Rile Him Up
The Wise Old Man plays a role in several quests, and these provide unique opportunities to get on his bad side. Let’s look at how you can use his quest appearances to your advantage.
Swan Song: Question His Leadership
In the “Swan Song” quest, the Wise Old Man leads you on a mission to fight the Sea Troll Queen. During the quest, challenge his decisions or dawdle when he’s giving instructions. For example, take your sweet time gathering items he asks for—like the 5 iron bars or 10 mist runes. His dialogue doesn’t change much, but the roleplay aspect of dragging your feet can feel like you’re testing his patience.
Tease Him About His Retirement
The Wise Old Man is retired, but he’s still itching for action. During “Swan Song” or casual chats, imply he’s too old to keep up with modern adventurers. Phrases like “Shouldn’t you be napping?” (typed in public chat near him) won’t get a direct response, but they add to the fun of imagining his irritation.
Creative Roleplay Ideas to Make Him Mad
OSRS is a sandbox game, so why not get creative? Here are some roleplay ideas to amplify your efforts to annoy the Wise Old Man, even if the game mechanics don’t fully support every action.
Dance Party Outside His House
Gather a group of friends, equip some flashy emotes (like Flap or Jig), and stage a dance party right outside his door. Spam the chat with “PARTY TIME!” or “WAKE UP, OLD MAN!” While he won’t storm out, the absurdity of disrupting his quiet village life is peak OSRS chaos.
Spam Emotes in His Face
Stand in his house and spam emotes like Raspberry or Cry. Combine this with dropping random items (e.g., ashes or bones) on his floor. It’s like being the annoying neighbor he never asked for—perfect for getting under his virtual skin.
Spread Rumors in Draynor Village
Run around Draynor shouting (via public chat) things like “The Wise Old Man lost to a goblin!” or “He’s scared of chickens!” Other players might join in, turning it into a community roast. He won’t react directly, but the lore-breaking slander fits his grumpy vibe.
Tips to Enhance Your Annoying Experience
Making the Wise Old Man angry is all about having fun, but a few extra tricks can level up your game. Here’s how to maximize the experience without crossing any lines that’d get you muted.
Use Low-Level Gear for Extra Sass
Show up in bronze armor or a wooden shield and ask him for combat advice. The contrast between his epic past and your noobish gear might not trigger unique dialogue, but it’s a hilarious way to roleplay disrespecting his expertise.
Bring Friends for a Group Effort
Everything’s better with friends! Coordinate with your clan or random players in Draynor to bombard him with questions, trades, and emotes simultaneously. The sheer volume of annoyance could make even a stoic NPC like him wish he’d stayed retired.
Record Your Shenanigans
Use RuneLite’s screenshot feature or record a clip of your antics. Share it on X or the OSRS subreddit with a title like “How I Made the Wise Old Man Rage Quit Retirement.” It’s a fun way to engage the community and immortalize your mischief.
Quick List of Items to Annoy Him With:
- Bronze dagger – Useless and cheap.
- Cabbage – The ultimate troll item.
- Rotten tomato – Perfect for petty trades.
- Bucket – Ask him if it’s a rare artifact.
- Chicken egg – Claim it’s a dragon egg.
Action | Expected Reaction | Fun Factor |
---|---|---|
Ask about junk items | Grumpy dismissal | 7/10 |
Mention bank robbery | Defensive retort | 8/10 |
Dance party | No reaction (roleplay win) | 9/10 |
Spam emotes | Silent annoyance | 6/10 |
Making the Wise Old Man angry in OSRS is less about game mechanics and more about embracing the game’s playful spirit. From spamming dialogue to staging village-wide chaos, these methods let you flex your creativity while honoring the absurdity that makes OSRS special. So, grab your cabbage, rally your friends, and head to Draynor Village—let’s see how grumpy we can make this old legend!